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You know they won’t mention this or her again until the next uncomfortable encounter.

You’re out to lunch with the fam, and somehow your girlfriend is the only one whose invitation has been unintentionally/intentionally withheld, and every once in a while you have to bring her up and that restaurant you went to together, just to remind people that she still exists.

Well, it’s nothing compared to the glare of death your mom will give you if you so much as hint at just how gay you are while grandma is visiting.

Bonus points if you get the infamous “No empieces” through gritted teeth.

It’s been my experience, being a queer who is also a Mexican and member of a family that just barely has its foot out of the closet, that there are ways to navigate through family functions that are borderline ridiculous.

Having spoken to other lesbian and queer friends and acquaintances, we’ve found that our experiences are pretty similar.

For second-generation Mexican-Americans living in these border communities, this "hybrid" culture causes many questions of identification to arise.

When the family immigrated will greatly affect the strength of the ties to this heritage and dating traditions.

However, because this mixing of language occurs on a local level there are many varieties in language as one moves along the border emphasizing the uniqueness of each border community due its culture being constructed and redefined on a local level to meet local needs.

The emergence of this mixed language also serves to reaffirm the notion of Borderland Culture as those who subscribe to it are neither accepted into American Culture nor accepted into Mexican Culture.

Your mom is sure that her only hope for grandmotherhood is your younger brother, and now you find yourself explaining the ins and outs of sperm donors and adoption, as well as assuring her that your ovaries still work.

Remember the pinch on the arm when you couldn’t sit still in church when you were little?

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